Tepid

the sun shines

the warmth visits my face

my sweater is unneeded

and still my heart

feels cold

no

tepid

desperate for the shield of excessive layers

hungry for privacy

a retreat from required civility

weary of disappointments

and devastations

convinced somehow that my own company will bring contentment 

like that of others does not

Storytime Observation

I'm going back to my early Children's Librarianship roots, planning to start offering Sensory Storytimes - specifically designed for children who have developmental issues, and their families.  To that end I was observing a colleague providing a Sensory Storytime at the North Natomas Library, the location where my friend Amber was murdered 6 weeks ago. This is in the room where we used to meet as the AccessABILITY committee, which Amber chaired. It all brought up emotions. Aside from taking notes on the storytime itself, I wrote:

Here in this place
where you were
where you left us
seeing the children
welcome and loud and innocent and joyous
and your colleague,
smiling and serving and loving these children
I know that the good you brought
    to which you contributed
will continue to grow
The light will not just shine
but
will
win
in the end

Spoken Word: a poem for Amber

Amber was taken from us way too soon.  She was a friend and colleague of mine, and I have had so many emotions around her murder that I have been re-visiting my poetic side to process things.

I shared this at one of her memorial services, and it apparently touched many.