Seriously? Another one?

Yea, well, I'm on medical leave again. I know, I know - when will it end? I have no idea, and frankly, I'd love it if I were doing anything but this - trust me!

I've been complaining of this drippy nose - these sinus issues - for months. Months and months and months. Well, turns out, it wasn't mucus of any kind, it was actually spinal fluid. Leaking out my nose. Yea, you read it right. It is a spontaneous CSF leak. How weird is that? Pretty darn weird, let me tell you! And scary, too, because if stuff can leak out, other stuff can get in, which put me at great risk for . . . oh . . . menenghitis, etc. Sounds lovely, eh? How does this happen, you ask? Is it my wild lifestyle, the fall I took in January? what? Well, we're still trying to figure that out (me and my new Doctor pals), but it is most likely from long-undiagnosed sleep apnea. No kidding! Again - how freaky is that!?!?!!?

Ok - so one day I'm working and dripping and getting a few minor headaches, and the next day I'm fearing for my life and wondering what will happen and knowing that I might need to have brain surgery. Then they got it all figured out and realized that they could do the surgery through the nose, which means no cool scars (not even black eyes - sorry - nothing cool to photograph at all, really, except the bags under my eyes, but honestly, they're usually there anyway).

Basically, the Dr had told me Thursday, July 23, to await his call Monday morning to get another CT scan and an endoscopy (up my nose with a rubber hose, or summat). They were going to get me in Friday the 24th, but the Dr was busy, as was I (heading North for my brother's wedding)

So Monday found me calling off and waiting a bit, and then getting scoped and scanned, and then Tuesday found me in the hospital, and there you have it. That Thursday - hmm - July 30, they did the surgery (had to do more tests first, of course, including lumbar puncture, and then they put in a lumbar drain, an experience I would only wish on people who are cruel to small children). The surgeon took some bone tissue from my left sinus area and used it to patch the holes he found. Instead of small holes, actually, he found a thinned area - like a very worn cover of a book - or a sieve (my sister always said I have a memory like a steel sieve), and he patched it, then stuffed that side of my facial parts with . . . well . . . I have no idea what is in there, but I can tell you I'm sick of it! It's helping to hold the patch in place when I cough, though, or when I sneeze, which I do occassionally. Blah. I'm not allowed to blow my nose, or bend over forward, or pick up anything heavy (pity - no laundry for me, still!)

I have no idea when I'll be able to go back to work. I keep thinking it'll just be a bit more, but I am getting the feeling this week that this is all a much bigger deal than I was letting myself believe.

Signs that this is harder on my body than I'd like to admit:

• I don't feel like being social at all - have even asked for fewer phone calls
• I'm tired all the time, and have headaches a lot
• Sleeping often makes my headaches worse - figure THAT out!
• I don't feel much like knitting (don't be scared - yesterday I knit about 3 rounds on a hat I'm making)
  
• I was light-sensitive for about 4 days after surgery, and couldn't really focus my eyes for at least that long - longer, actually, I think
• My memory is fuzzy
• I have odd tingling sometimes - like the palms of my hands, my baby toes, or my left buttock - go figure
• I don't feel like eating, and when I do, nothing seems to taste good (ok - that sweet corn from the farm market yesterday was awesome - and at lunch I could still barely finish one ear)

So - I'm trying to find ways to cheer myself up. Will you help? There are a lot of idioms that we use in our language that would be very funny if used by me in this situation . I've got a few here, but please share any you think of, and give me an example of how I can use it in conversation! I'm looking for humor here - tasteless is definitely in bounds!

• I needed this like I needed a hole in my head.
• This has given me a whole new meaning for "brain drain" and I'm not sure I like it!
• Look, it's not exactly brain surgery, right? Just do it!